AI Text to Video is improving at an incredible rate. This song and the video were created with written prompts: prompts that produce clips that can be either accepted or rejected. The detail in the prompts is what matters most. For this, I specified the French Quarter, New Orleans, late June, dusk, 1968, as a basis for every image, for example. (Specifying the lighting really is key, as it helps tie it all together). This video was mostly produced in Hailuoai and Kling, but many other platforms are available. The most amazing creative tools are now available for everyone. Please try them. It’s so much fun.
WHEN BOTS RULE THE WORLD
“How was your experience coming through security today? I know it was six in the morning and we forced you to hold your hands above your head like an armed bank robber before you’d even had a sip of coffee, and scanned all your belongings, and reached into your wash bag and held your hemorrhoid tube up to the light, but how do you think we did on a scale of one to ten? And after we barked at you to remove your belt and wiped inside your backpack for explosives, how likely are you to recommend Terminal 3 to your family and friends in the future? Oh, and while you’re there, how would you score the toilet facilities? Did you manage to get any water out of the computerised taps? One wave across the nozzle normally does the trick. Not too close, mind. And did you enjoy our jet engine powered hand dryers? Yes I know they’re noisier than an Airbus 380 but they do switch off eventually. Just press the smiley face or the frown and we’ll feed that back to the cleaner at his six monthly review, yes the guy who mopped between your legs you as you urinated, and can’t speak English anyway. Your custom is important to us.”
Rate my Cell
You think this is far fetched? This very week prisoners in Scottish police cells have been asked to rate their stay as part of a ‘custody user experience survey’. I’m happy to reveal that, to date, I’ve yet to experience police cell hospitality, but I can imagine that the quality of the mattresses could probably be improved upon somewhat. Perhaps someone could let me know if things are upgraded.
Bouncer-Bots
Once upon a time, getting hold of customer service meant waiting on hold for hours to speak with someone who we now know was the prototype for the chatbot: highly and specifically trained to know absolutely nothing about any of its company’s products whatsoever. Today, most of us have become familiar with the first generation of chatbot. These smiling, empty headed digital bouncers have one job: to stop you getting past them. “You’ll find all the answers you need on our website. Thank you so much for your patience”
Battle-Bots
If you think things are bad now, oh boy are you in for a surprise. Take a complaint to customer service in a couple of years and you’ll come face to face with the spine-chilling battle-bot. Its voice will be gentle and seductive with a millennial ‘upspeak’ to help feign interest in your issue. But you can be certain they won’t give a flying damn about you. Armed now with legal knowledge and legions of small print they will calmly explain that there’s absolute sod all you can do. They’ll be really nice about it, of course, but at the end of their monologue they’ll always, always ask if you understand their position. Acknowledging this will end the complaint, as far as the bot is concerned. Although, of course, a bot can never actually be concerned. “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”
And don’t you dare swear or shout in frustration because that will be logged as a potential hate crime, badly affecting your personal customer rating. They will warn you of this when they tell you they’re recording the call for training purposes. (For ‘training’ read ‘legal’). They may even ban you from using their ‘services’ ever again. It helps protect the integrity of the brand, you see. Utterly crestfallen, tearful and verging on broken you will surely end up conceding. By this point you will have likely forgotten what it was you were calling about in the first place, having endured a blitz of similar case studies that legally prove you have absolutely no leg to stand on.
Oh yes, and these new bots will no longer be faceless as they will be keen to get you on a video call, as this helps feed their data capture file on you. Facial recognition software will swiftly judge your mood and the bot’s tones and vocabulary adjusted accordingly. They will predominantly be female, reasonably but not overtly attractive, of subtle mixed race and with a gently unidentifiable exotic accent. If you let loose a rant on them they will patiently wait until you finish, knowing that the video of your tirade will be evidence enough to bury you should you decide to take any further action.
Pester-Bots
The battle-bots on the frontline in customer service will share data with the pester-bots in sales. Superpowered by AI, pester-bots will be calling us up after every tiny, meaningless interaction we make in the world. These will be the girls that call at random to ask if you could spare a couple of minutes to tell them how great they are. They will dangle various freebies and customer points to help boost your personal rating, so that much like a timeshare presentation there’ll be something in it for you if you can withstand the gruelling indoctrination and the dirty feeling of having been thoroughly used.
Over the next five years this smiling army of digital bouncers, battle-bots and pester-bots will be adopted by every brand you wish to name. But one thing’s for sure, they will be wholeheartedly embraced by the public sector. Our hyper-litigiously aware public bodies are sure to embrace a technology that resolves the majority of its issues without ever having to talk to a stupid, red-faced hominid ever again. But here’s the thing: I guarantee that within a few short years, when AI bots have become ubiquitous, clever brands will see an exciting new opportunity to differentiate themselves by reintroducing…actual humans. Yes! Real, live human beings that might not know very much but can at least make a sarcastic joke about the weather while they look into your case. Funny old world.
Howard Saunders is a Retail Futurist and AI enthusiast
Join me on Twitter @retailfuturist
howard@22and5.com